How to better your mindset to help you make your day better.   You are beautiful and you should embrace it!  You are an amazing human being and I want you to be proud of it!  These days, there is a lot of media and discussion about making yourself better and changing who you are.  I have been struggling with this personally and have come to some interesting conclusions.  I am also working on staying in my happy place and knowing how to better my mindset has helped.
You are who you are today because of the life that you have lived up to this point.  You cannot change the past, but you can definitely deal with the future.  I know that we would all love to live the “perfect life” that we get bombarded with from TV and the media.  BUT, unless, it is the perfect life for you and your family, then it will be a difficult row to hoe.  Everyone is different, therefore every “perfect life” is different.  There is no one glass slipper to fit us all and there is definitely no “perfect”.
We all need to give ourselves a break and just work on being a better version of ourselves.  I know that this sounds crazy because we hear all day that with this new thing, your life will be instantly better!  Whether it be a new phone, new gadget for the house or new widget.  Your life will be better when you take an inventory and see how you are doing.  Your life is probably pretty damn good, if you just step back and look at it with fresh eyes!  Reviewing your life is definitely how to better your mindset.
Find Your Happy Place
Let’s work on figuring out how to help you find your happy place! Always remember that you have to be brutally honest and truthful with yourself.  You will not be tested or judged on this and as time goes on, your answers may change.  I have learned that my opinions change as I implement new things and that is good!  We are growing and changing every day, so our goals and aspirations have to change with us.
How to Better Your Mindset | Using your perceptions to feel better
Make a List
First of all, sit down in a quiet place for a few minutes and just try to relax.  Take a piece of paper and a pen or your phone, so that you can make a list.  Make a list of everything that you enjoy about your life right now.  On the same page, write down things that you would like to change.  Go back to your regular day and look at the list later.  I tend to think of more things if my mind gets distracted and you can always add to the list.  Anything and everything can go on the list, no matter how big or how small.
Review your List
Secondly, find some more quiet time to review your list.  I know that this in itself may be an insurmountable task, but you will really feel better once you do it.  Look at the list of things that you enjoy about your life now and rejoice in them! You have done a great job making a life for you and your family!  We tend to forget to look at the enjoyable parts of our lives because we are too caught up in the day to day grind!
Change you Perception
Now, look at the change list and think about your feelings behind why you want to change them.  I have learned that sometimes, it is not the action that I want to change, but the way that I perceive the action.  Some of us may see it as a detriment, while others look at it as a positive.  See if some of your changes can be moved to the enjoyable list, if you just work on your perspective.  Write down how you can work on the things that you want to change.  A perfect example for me is weight loss, but then I decided that being healthy is a better goal for me.
Here are some of the ways that I have been working on this myself.  Perspective is always an issue for me and I am trying to look at things in a better light everyday.  Our daughter surprised us and drove home from camp for Father’s Day.  If we had known, we would have told her not to come.  But we had not seen her for a couple of weeks and it was wonderful to have her home, even for 12 hours! I cherished that little bit of time with her, rather than getting upset that she drove so far without telling us.
Implement Changes
Look at the list of things that you want to change and the feelings behind them.  If they are not just perspective shifts, then let’s work on how to implement the changes.  Break the list down into things that can be changed easily or in a short period of time versus things that will take longer to change.  Start working on the things that can be changed shortly and then add them to the happy list.  Remember to take it one step at a time and rejoice in the changes as they happen.  It is more beneficial to me to write things down and check them off.  It adds to the sense of accomplishment.
For the longer term changes, break them down into smaller steps and set a time frame for them.  Rejoice in every completed step and simply rework your list as time passes or circumstances change.  This entire process is about helping you make the life that you want, which will definitely change with time.  None of this is set in stone, it is just a framework to help you look at your life and make it your Happy Place.
New Journey for Me
This year started for me as a year of being proactive and working on my life, rather than just getting along.  I signed up for some courses to organize my life and make priorities.  This is something that I had never really done and am still getting comfortable with.  I tend to keep my head down and deal with the day to day.  It is amazing what we can do if we just set our minds to it!
One of my changes was to be the best me possible and not “perfect” anymore!  I admit that as time has passed, I am not as svelte as I used to be.  Trying diets and products and such have been successful, until my will power wanes!  I also like a nice adult beverage from time to time and think eating amazing food is the best present in the world!  When I changed my perspective recently, I shifted to wanting to be healthy, rather than skinny.  I am exercising more and paying attention to what I eat, but not beating myself up if we go eat something fun!
Try New Things
I am making myself jump into the deep end and try new things, like we did when we were younger.  They may not all be successful, but they can be fun and a learning experience.  I look at my kids and see all of the wonderful things that they do.  I want to lead by example and show them that anything is possible, if they just put their mind to it.  That passion for learning and trying something new should not fade as we age.
You should surround yourself with people who encourage you and ignore all of the other noise out there!  I am the worst about worrying about what other people think and trying to make everyone else happy.  This does not take you to your happy place in the long run.  I am not saying that you should completely ignore other people’s feelings or opinions, just take it all with a grain of salt.  Listen to that voice inside of you and do what you think is best for you!
I seem to be always looking for the perfect fix, via someone else’s system.  As individual’s, one person’s fix, may be a wrench in the system for you.  You have to keep trying until you find the match for you and your life.  Never give up trying and always remember that tomorrow is a new day and a new chance to do it your way.  I am working on how to better my mindset and help me get to my happy place.  This is a journey and I am taking the first steps and would love for you to follow the path with me!


  1. New perspective is a really hard thing to achieve, especially if you’ve been in a negative mindset for a long time. I appreciate the detailed map of how to improve your outlook – I need to find more quiet time for this!

    1. Author

      Try doing it a little bit at a time. Quiet time is hard to find, but small pieces make up a larger picture. Thanks so much for reading & good luck! I would love to talk more about it, if you would like. Email me at

    1. Author

      Taking the first step is the most important. Just take your time and work on it at your own pace. Please feel free to email me if you would like to discuss it some more. My email is Thanks and have a great day!

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